The work-life balance.
It’s a small phrase that bears a world of weight.
The most daunting part of my return to full-time employment was figuring out how to juggle the all-encompassing roles of “career woman” and “Dylan’s mommy.” For a year and a half, my son and I spent almost every waking hour together, and a drastic change in day-to-day life was on the horizon for both of us.
When I say the initial transition was hard, that’s nothing short of a huge understatement. Each morning, I cried after leaving him, but walking into the office, a switch flipped. My brain zoned right back into that professional space, and it felt really good.
When I was on my longer-than-anticipated maternity leave, there was little time to think about that void in my life. A flood of unexpected chaos was revolving in my world, and Dylan’s mommy was all I could be. Every last drop of energy was focused on that role, and I immersed myself in being the most loving, nurturing, attentive, hands-on mother.
My son is the light of my life, and our bond is indescribable because of the time we spent together. I cherish him more than anything in this world, and throughout the waves that crashed over the past couple years, he’s been my life boat.
One day, about a year ago, I looked at my reflection and realized it was time to make the jump.
There’s a canvas hanging at my desk with a quote from Elizabeth Taylor: “Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick, and pull yourself together.”
That’s exactly what I did.
I made a strategic plan of returning to the job in which I thrived for so long. The reasons why I needed to do this are extensive enough to consume an entire column, but without going into detail, it was mainly to be the best version of myself possible.
On Friday nights, after productive, creativity-fueling weeks in the office, I stare at my son and feel such a great sense of accomplishment for everything I’ve done. I’ve acclimated to my reduced schedule of Monday-through-Friday time with him, but weekends make up for it, and each moment is strongly savored. Most days, the phrase that comes to mind is, “I’ve got this,” but lately, the balance hasn’t been as equal as I envision it to be.
I’ve taken on several projects that require longer days, working weekends and out-of-office commitments. I leave the house very early in the mornings and return far later than usual. This results in my time as “Dylan’s mommy” being limited to wake-ups and bed time, and although I chose to delve into these additional responsibilities as a “career woman,” it’s not easy to sort through the emotional aftershocks that arise.
Since re-establishing my position in the workforce, I tell people there are two categories in my life: Dylan and work. It simplifies my ever-evolving circumstances, and for my current situation, it’s been the right decision.
I know the balance will soon retilt the other way. When I leave Dylan before the day gets going, guilt creeps up, but I push it back down.
The two categories that consume my plate are both extremely healthy, I never bite off more than I can chew, and the sense of joy I get from both my son and my career are fabulously fulfilling.
The work-life balance.
Teetering between the loves of my life has its moments, but I wouldn’t change a thing.
Tonight, I’ll be taking Elizabeth Taylor’s advice by pouring a well-deserved glass of wine and celebrating.
It’s a very empowering feeling to have pulled myself together while working to leave an impression that will last far longer than my re-applied lipstick.
Shari Puterman is the assistant regional features editor, a proud mommy and a lifetime Jersey Girl currently living in Matawan.
If you’re a “Working Woman” doing your best to balance it all and would like to be considered for an upcoming story, email sputerman@app.com.